One of the worst pains to feel is heartbreak. To be smacked in the face with truth and be left alone standing with it. To have the pieces of your heart begin to break…. After you spent time making it whole.
Heartbreak forces you to confront yourself. It makes you face the carnal response auto set to deal with pain. Mine is anger.
I felt like a fiery hurricane and I was battling for control. The “old” me wanted to lash out and hurt someone in return. The “new” me knew that response wasn’t right and was fighting to quell the storm.
Forgive them…. right now.
You want me to do what God!?!? Are you serious???? Right NOW!?!? In the midst of my tears? In the midst of my frustration and rage? Now?
I had to pause. I couldn’t answer my Heavenly Father because the war was on in my spirit. My flesh vs my spirit. And I was fighting not to emotional shutdown. I was fighting not to give up on love, on relationships… And in order to forgive, I have to process all of these feelings and then let it go… Let go of the disappointment of getting it wrong again.
“Promise me, O women of Jerusalem, by the gazelles and wild deer, not to awaken love until the time is right.”Song of Songs 2:7 NLT
Ladies, it is better to wait and be found by the right one, than to be distracted and deceived by the wrong one.
You have a wonderful light that the world needs, but the enemy through counterfeit relationships, distracts us. We get all consumed by this relationship until it fails. And it takes time for God to heal us and mend our broken hearts. And before you know it, it’s been 6 months, a year, or even three years before you get refocused and pursue your purpose. It takes time before you strive to reach your goals or find your confidence again.
All the work you have done: the healing, the changing of bad habits, pursuing your dreams; it’s worth too much to be given away lightly. To sow good seed and end up with a bad investment.
I thank God that I was determined in January to continue to answer the call on my life. Despite what was falling apart, I was determined to use my time wisely. I am determined not to allow this storm to take me out when I was on the edge of a new season. On the edge of my promise.
I pray sweet sisters, that you commit yourself to God and the process He is taking you through. Run every relationship by Him- only He knows what the truth is. Only God is looking at it with clear eyes. And most importantly, be willing to forsake what feels good in the moment, knowing that God will never without any good thing from you. If He’s asking you to let it go, it means He has something or someone better for you.
And if you need a friend, someone to understand…
I got you.